A quick update

1. My spots got a lot worse, and now they seem to be getting better but I still look ridiculous. Lara suggested scabies, but the doctor ruled it out because it didn't have one crucial scabies symptom or something. The current hypothesis is the mother of all heat rashes.

2. There was an earthquake (mag. 6.2) on Saturday night (early Sunday morning actually) but I didn't feel it.

3. An Indonesian soldier was shot dead in Banda Aceh. The news reports haven't specified a date, but my friends saw police road blocks on Friday night, so it was probably then. No one seems too troubled yet, so neither am I.

4. Radio Australia seems to be the first media outlet in the world to report anything on Aceh lately. Good on Radio Australia. Paying as much attention to Indonesia (and not just Shapelle) as the Australian media should.

5. I bought a new desk and book shelf on the weekend and last night I assembled the desk using the most inadequate instructions I've ever seen. I am proud to say that the desk looks almost exactly like the picture in the instructions and seems to have no fatal flaws. It doesn't even wobble that much.

Because I know you're all dying for more info, I'll update about the scabies again tomorrow.

T-ra.

And my health degenerates further

I was at a party on Wednesday night (I know, how hardcore am I to go to a midweek party?) and I was getting bitten by so many mosquitoes. And they were SO itchy.

The next morning I was still itching like crazy, and over the course of the day it just got worse. It was then that I notices that these bites were hard and raised and not at all regular and, well, they were ALL OVER MY BODY.

Behold the hideousness:

Figure 1.1. My leg














Figure 1.2. My arm














My colleagues have many theories as to what caused this and most of them relate to food. The most common is that I've eaten too many prawns or too much Indomie (instant noodles). The cure is also almost always a food or drink. Green coconut has been a popular remedy. But no one can really decide if these are insect bites or some other kind of allergic reaction.

To get a second opinion I went to the doctor and it went like this:

Me: I have spots
Dr: When did it start?
Me: Most likely Wednesday
Dr: Is it itchy?
Me: Yes
Dr: OK. Roll up your sleeve. I'm giving you an injection. And then go to the pharmacy and collect two kinds of drugs and a cream.
Me: Ouch, that injection really hurt.

I don't want to push negative stereotypes about Indonesian doctors, but seriously that was the extent of the consultation.

I went to the pharmacy and picked up the medication. About 40 tablets cost 2000 Rupiah, which roughly converted equals 20 cents. No wonder drugs get handed out like tic tacs.

Please, dear reader, tell me what is wrong with me.

A milestone and a medical anomaly all in one post!

I posted the long-awaited Bali photos, but because I started the post a week ago, you have to look below this and the previous post to find it.

All this messy half-posting and updating later allowed me to overlook a very special milestone.

My 100th POST!

My 100th post occurred almost exactly six months into the life of this blog (and my stay in Aceh obvs). I wonder if I will write another 100 posts over the next six months. Is this my standard posting rate? Only time will tell. But what it tells me now is that my current posting rate is very low. I have visions of updating daily but I've only squeezed out 100 posts in around 180 days. I will try to increase posting but we're all going to have to make some sacrifices to realise this dream. Your sacrifice will be to lower your standards and except some very ordinary material. Thanks, I can really tell you guys are with me on this.

Now, to set the tone of the next six months of posting I will explore a fascinating subject: My pupils.

I woke up this morning and my eyes looked VERY dark. It was cool, but of course your eyes aren't supposed to change colour (unless you're one of those people whose eyes change colour). On close examination I realised my pupils were larger than usual and wondered if this was what is meant by 'dilated pupils'. Is there a moment when large pupils cross over and become 'dilated'?

To find out more I wikied 'dilated pupils' and this is the text and image it gave me (beware, it's hideous):

Mydriasis is an excessive dilation of the pupil due to disease, trauma or drugs. Normally, the pupil dilates in the dark and constricts in the light. A mydriatic pupil will remain excessively large, even in a bright environment. Sometimes colloquially referred to as a "blown pupil."




















As my friend Jesse would say "that's totally grodie". I think he means gross, which is what I mean now. Clarification: this is NOT my eye.

So now that I've exhausted all scientific avenues (if it's not in Wikipedia it doesn't exist right?), maybe you guys can tell me what's wrong with me. No, I am not taking drugs. Haha, funny.

It is 100% STRUGS to write a post today. I've even uploaded lots of photos (usually the most boring part of posting process) and all I need is to add some commentary and I'm done. BUT I JUST CAN'T DO IT!

So instead I will give you a teaser photos of what is to come.



















No, this photo isn't a still from a film, this was taken in Bali. Don't you think it looks like she's found herself in a post-apocalyptic world and she's just spotted a creature mutated by nuclear radiation? The crazy cow in the background can't be bringing much comfort either.

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This advertisement is AMAZING. The end, when they advertise the product (that I won't mention on my blog with the hope of holding onto a string of integrity) is kind of lame.

Rocking Bali's socks off and keeping the paps at bay

Last week there was a lack of inspiration and this week there is a lack of time. I don't have enough time to write lots of words about Bali, but these photos are overdue. Probably all of these photos were taken by Meaghan and Beck.

Did I mention that we were traveling with a celebrity? Ryan was a HIT in Bali. He was pale, cute and smiled and laughed at EVERYONE (is there anyone that this kid doesn't love?)

Here are just a few examples of Ryan-fever:


















In the photo below Ryan is being held by our driver Made while some girls take photos of them both. This photo doesn't even capture half of the extravaganza that was four girls spotting Ryan and going CRAZY.










































Unfortunately it went to his head:



















And it seems that I didn't like sharing the spotlight at all:














Look at him...so smug and laughing. Yeah, it's easy being on top Pal...just you wait. The death knell of your celebrity, Celebrity Big Brother is just around the corner for you.

When I was plotting my own comeback, I pretended to be Ryan's friend. We went swimming.



















We were all big fans of the pool.














Meags captured this postcard sunset when we had dinner at the ultra-deluxe LaLuciolla. Oh my steak...I wish I could eat you all over again.


















Sometimes it rained. A LOT.














Sometimes we rested with blankets over our heads.














One day we visited monkeys and spotted...A BABY!





























Beck made a great nature documentary about this little guy's bid for freedom that was curtailed (HA) when his mum grabbed his tail (HAHA). I've uploaded it to YouTube and will embed tomorrow.

Pre-Bali meditations on a theme

Because it's been two weeks since my last trip, I just can't fathom another day without travel. So today I will go to Bali.

And it's a total holiday! Eight whole days of holiday.

I haven't been doing much in the last week that I can post about. I took some photos of a giant spider in my kitchen and a cute kitten but I didn't bring my camera to the office.

So today's post will be a reflection. Unfortunately this doesn't present any obvious opportunities for photos. Unless you want to see a photo of me thinking.













Reflection no.1.
An observation about travelling out of Aceh: I can handle cold water showers every day but the day I am travelling. It's like my mind knows that hot showers await and that I don't need to kid myself that cold showers are fine. I think this can tell us a lot about expectations and how they impact on our acceptance of certain realities.

Even though I am LOVING my current jet-setting lifestyle, it might actually be making it harder to accept the day to day living standards of Aceh. I had ceased perceiving cold water, scratchy sheets and limited food choices as discomforts. Rather, what I was experiencing was a lack of luxury items. I think you would have to agree that the relative lack of comfort in not having a fine Egyptian cotton bath towel is far easier to accept than the discomfort of having no towel at all. If I begin to perceive cold water as a discomfort again I am in trouble. If I get fussy about food I might even starve.

Reflection no.2.
There is one thing in my house that I will NEVER be able to accept. And I think it might be that it is a potential health risk. Fecal matter in my mandi. That's right...POO! Here is an example of a mandi (this is one in my office. I took this photo to capture the manky green water).
















I'll often use the mandi to wash my face and hands and brush my teeth. Traditionally it the only means of washing. I have a shower head so I don't use it for everything.

You use the little red bucket seen in the photo above to get the water out of the mandi. Theoretically the mandi should never be contaminated with soap or dirt. For example, if you want to wash your hands you scoop up some water in the bucket and pour it over your hands onto the floor (this is the kind of bathroom that stays wet from floor to ceiling all the time).

But now mine is contaminated not with soap or dirt, but animal poo. I can identify rat poo but there is some crazy other pooing going on in there that is just FREAKING ME OUT. Not only are there unidentified animals living inside my house, they are pooing in my face-washing water.

I thought the animals living in my house might be mongoose (mongooses, mongeese?), so I Wikied it and discovered that Indonesia has 100s of animals that could possibly inhabit my house and poo in my water. Possums, bandicoots, bats, megabats. Why don't don't they tell of you of the dangers when you arrive at the airport?

Any advice on ridding my house of these unwanted , disease-ridden monsters will be gratefully received.

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Even though I am having 8 DAYS OF HOLIDAYS, I am going to have to work a bit, so if there are any special Bali treats you would like, or if you think of any good places to visit in Bali go ahead and send me an email.

Stuff White People Like: The BEST SITE EVER

Stuff White People Like has been getting lots of 'buzz' lately so I'm a little embarrassed to just jump on a bandwagon and post like, totally a week too late. (Potential Stuff that white people like #82: being the first to 'discover' something).

But seriously guys, this is THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER READ. I am prone to exaggeration, but I really mean it this time.

Take some examples of stuff white people like:
#1: Coffee
#2: Religions their parents don't belong to
#16: Gifted children
#71: Being the only white person around

Read Stuff White People Like, and I can assure you it will describe the things that drive you crazy about other people (#28 Not having a TV; #67 Standing still at concerts), and your own White Person sins (#52 Sarah Silverman, #72 study abroad). There will also be a gazillion "it's funny because it's true!" moments.

I'm not at all convinced that this list describes only white people or would include poor white people, but putting those details aside, this list is right on the mark for describing some kind of demographic that I think most of my readers belong to. If you cannot identify with a single thing on this list (that includes the non-whites reading this) please let me know.

As I write this post some other "Stuff White People Like" have come to my attention.

Potential #83: blogging about websites (and movies, music) as an expression of how knowledgeable you are about cool things. My blog is one of about a trillion others.

Potential #84: Living in dangerous places (or making them sound dangerous even when they are not).

And thanks to Bryant's bitching about Gmail's Archive function that inspired this one:

Potential #85: de-cluttering (and looking down on people who hoard)


I could go ON AND ON about this. I've had to force myself to stop adding to the list. Believe it or not, I actually have to get back to work (#12: Non-Profit Organizations).

Another week in Aceh

All is quiet on the Aceh front this week.

Although there was the most violent conflict-related act since the signing of the peace agreement over the weekend.

And of course there were all those earthquakes last week and at least one more this week.

And just to keep those things in perspective, this morning I was charged by a bull and stepped in dog poo (no news reports on these events yet, but when they make headlines I'll link them here).

I didn't intend for this post to be a list of things going wrong in Aceh, but when I wrote "all is quiet on the Aceh front" and realised how ridiculous that statement was, the only natural thing to do was post about all the dramas and....

...complain that still no one emails me! I linked reports from AUSTRALIAN NEWSPAPERS, to make the point that you have access to information about Aceh dramas and yet the concern is BARELY audible. One concerned SMS from Australia is all I got when a mag. 7.3 earthquake struck in Aceh. ONE SMS! 7.3!

Yes, I am fine but clearly that is SO NOT THE POINT.

While on the topic of how hard my life is, next week I'm going to Bali with Beck and Meaghan. you know what that means....CARE PACKAGES! That's right, some bonds undies and salt and vinegar chips is all it takes for Sarah to forget months of neglect. And if your love for me isn't enough to motivate, remember that Bali is full of cool stuff to send back to my loving family and friends.